Want to know about one thing, besides a relationship with Christ, that I believe is KEY to having a happy marriage?
I know, right? That felt a little anticlimactic. I bet you expected me to say weekly date nights or to give you a book recommendation. Well, while dates are amazing and biblical resources are a great thing, I truly believe praying for your husband is where it’s at.
Did you ever hear this quote by Andrew Murray?
Prayer is not monologue, but dialogue; God’s voice is its most essential part.
Wow. Too often I use my time in prayer as just an opportunity to parade all my cares, my concerns, and my to do list in front of Him, and then ask for His help with all of it.
But prayer should be so much more than that! It must be me, baring my soul before the God Who sees all. Me, pouring out my heart to the One Who catches all my tears. It must be me, listening to the voice of the One Who spoke the universe into existence from nothingness. Me, in every moment before Him realizing more and more how helpless and unworthy I am of being there.
And yet being allowed to stay. No, being welcomed to stay. Asked to stay.
And during this holy exercise, this supernatural conversation with Almighty God, bring your husband to Him. Your relationship with your man is the most important one you have on this planet. The best thing you could ever EVER do for your guy is to talk to God about him. Do you ever pray for your husband? I mean, really pray?
I am all about helping you the THRIVE in your womanhood the Bible way. SO, I’m not just going to fling fancy words about prayer at you, tell you to pray for your husband, and then leave you wondering…
So, how do we do that?
Would you let me name just five things to pray for your husband?
1). His relationship with God.
This is the single MOST important thing about your marriage—your relationship with God! As you pray for your husband, ask God to give your him a passion for reading and studying God’s Word. Beg God to fill you man with intense hunger and thirst for God’s truth. Pray that he would be disciplined enough to make the time to spend with his Savior. Pray that he would have a teachable, humble heart that is willing to apply the truth when he hears it. And plead for God to make your husband more and more like Jesus every day.
*Side note!* Do NOT use this as an opportunity to vent your frustrations over your husband’s shortcomings. I know you don’t have a perfect husband. Maybe he even has serious character flaws and makes life for you so very hard.
Refuse to allow bitterness to take root in your heart by permitting yourself to rant. Quietly, with a humble heart, bring those things before the Lord. He already knows about them. He knows your husband infinitely better than you do, and He knows what needs to take place in his heart. Leave the weaknesses of your husband at the feet of Christ—He’s the One Who died for them!
2). His relationship with you.
This is the next most important thing in your marriage! Ask God to make your husband, day by day, to be the leader that he has been called to be. Beg God to protect you BOTH from sexual temptations. Don’t think for a moment that either of you are above giving in to a temptation like that. Ask God to help you guard your hearts and to give you desires ONLY for each other. Pray for your husband to learn how to love you the way Christ does, and that his highest priority for your marriage would be that it is a Christ-centered one.
3). His role as a father/ leader of the home.
I have heard it said that not all men are born leaders, but all men are born to become leaders. It is true that that is God’s plan for your home. Your husband is the leader! Along with this role comes a great burden of responsibility and the need to learn how to be the right kind of leader for his home. Recognize in your prayers how hard that must be for your man. Pray for your husband to have supernatural wisdom for the many decisions he must make. Plead before your Savior to help your husband to be consistent, to take initiative, and to honor God by owning his role as the leader of the home he’s been blessed with. And ask God to teach you how to support him, encourage him, and honor him as he learns and grows in this important role.
4). His success in the workplace.
Whether your man is in full-time vocational ministry, furthering his education in med school, climbing the corporate ladder, or working the night shift at Wal-Mart, his work is very VERY important to him. That is how he is providing for his family! So pray for your husband to succeed in the position he has been given. Psalm 1 says that when a man delights in God’s Word, whatever that man does will prosper. Pray that for your guy! Pray that he will prosper, and that he will work for the glory of God with integrity and diligence.
5). His specific burdens.
You know what your man is struggling with. Maybe you’re going through a financially strained time. As hard as it is on us, it’s even harder on the guys because they have to fight feeling like a failure at providing for their family. Maybe there are extended family issues or health problems. Whatever specific burdens your man is shouldering, ask God to help him. Pray for your husband to receive and experience God’s strength, grace, and mercy as he carries those burdens. And ask God to help you know how to help your husband. Because, after all, that is your job! Most of all, ask for a teachable heart for the two of you. It is during hard times that God often reveals glorious truth about Himself to us, if only we are looking for it.
It is my prayer that YOU pray for you husbands. Let your prayer be a dialogue, not a monologue. Have a conversation with God about your man.
And I don’t mean over a cup of coffee.
Kneel down and spread out your open hands.
Close your eyes and spill hot tears of passion and pleading over your husband’s heart.
And just you watch. Your heart will be challenged and changed, too. Being in God’s presence tends to do that. 😉